November 20, 2010

Stuff Follow-up.

  • I got the job!!  WOOT. 

  • Things continue to go unusually well with Guy #1.  Here’s a weird story for you.  When we met, we both said each other looked familiar, but after talking we couldn’t figure out a common denominator and blew it off as a fluke.  However, on our date this week I was looking at some music and I mentioned a particular band and asked if he had ever seen them live.  He paused and then said, “That’s it”!  It ends up we met once before, about a year and ½ ago, at a live show of this band.  He remembered exactly where we were standing and described several of the friends I was with.  All of the sudden I had a visual and it all came flooding back.  I had noticed him, and at one point before the show he was standing right next to me.  Seeing as he was cute and by himself (or at least not with a gal), I struck up a conversation with him.  Neither of us could remember all of the conversation details (beers had been consumed), but it revolved around the band and lasted maybe 5-10 minutes, until the band came on stage.  I recall him being responsive, very nice, and obviously introverted based on his shy demeanor.  I always seem to go for the introverts.  Once the music started, I remember walking back closer to my friends thinking I frightened him with my assertive extroversion.  It wouldn’t have been the first time such a thing happened.  He found this funny and said that he thought I was cute, nice, and looked good in the hat I was wearing, but I guess his introversion was hard for me to read and led me to misinterpret as disinterest.  It would not be the first time for this either.  Thinking back to that time, it’s probably a good thing nothing came of that meeting, because I was in absolutely no place, shape or form to be dating anyone, so even if there would’ve been a connection that night I’m convinced it would’ve ultimately gone nowhere.  I am a firm believer that timing is everything, as they say.  Anyway, I don’t know whether to chalk this up to fate or the fact that we live in a small world, but I prefer the former.  Even if there ends up being no romantic future in the long run, I look at this as sign that we were meant to be in each other’s lives to some degree, for some reason.  I tend to think that most, if not all people come into our lives because we have something to learn from that person, just as they also have something to learn from us.  That’s how I think people, just accept it.

  • On to Guy #2.  First off, I appreciate all the feedback from my dear, loyal readers.  There may only be 3 of you, but you are all smart, interesting, awesome people and I am grateful for your honest opinions.  What you saw in the comments from my last post is what I got from my friends as well – very opposite viewpoints.  After processing it with my best friend I realized what I needed to do, which was to call Guy #2 back and be upfront that I recently began seeing someone and, although early, am interested enough to see where it goes.  I understand the idea of keeping my options open, but at the same time I also realized that going on a date w/this other guy would most likely only complicate things and make me feel uncomfortable.  And guilty (hey, I was raised Catholic.  It still stings).  If I know I really dig Guy #1 and have a good vibe about him, why explore Guy #2 right now when he likely wouldn’t stand a chance under the circumstances?  It didn’t seem fair.  I don’t want to lead Guy #2 on, and I felt by not saying anything and going on a date when my mind is elsewhere would be doing so and isn’t fair to anyone.  I also decided that, in the long run, it would reflect better on me to be honest from the start, as opposed to going out w/him and then later potentially revealing that I’m interested in someone else.  A few of my friends told me they were on the receiving end of such a situation, and they felt like crap as a result.  Seeing as this guy is a friend of a friend, former acquaintance, and I am assured to see him again, I’d rather he maintain a positive opinion of me, instead of thinking I am some sort of player who dates multiple people at once, which couldn’t be further from the truth.  I think there are good arguments for both sides of the equation, but the bottom line is that I had to do what I felt comfortable with.  Honesty is the best policy here at KATN.  So, after days of phone tag we finally spoke yesterday.  We mostly talked about high school, mutual friends, etc.  When he mentioned getting together, I revealed my situation, and he was extremely cool about it and thanked me for being upfront about it, saying he’d much rather know now than find out later.  With all of that aside and out in the open, we agreed that it would still be fun to get together in the near future, if for no other reason to rehash high school shit and develop a new friendship.  It only confirmed that I made the right decision.  I feel good about it

That is all for now.  I hope everyone has a most excellent weekend.  I promise the next post will not be about my dating life.  In the meantime, here is a rather funny skit about honesty and dating.

HonestyWatch it now!
Ugly AmericansNick Swardson's Pretend TimeThe Benson Interruption


  1. Hey, I'm glad things seem to be working out for the best. You go!

    Having never dated, that video made me laugh while simultaneously making my head spin at all the complicated nuances. Yikes.

  2. Well Vincent, I have done some dating in my time and that video makes me feel the same way. Dating, in general, rather sucks.