October 29, 2010

Insignificant Thoughts.



It's Friday, Folks, let's keep things light. 

Music snobs.  They really grind my gears.  There are various forms of music snobbery, but I’m focusing on those who turn their nose up or get a condescending tone when someone likes a certain artist or band that they deem crappy.  Hey, we all have our differences, and there is freedom of choice here in the U.S., no?  I will attest that there is music out there that I can’t and won’t listen to, whether it’s because I'm afraid my ears will bleed, or because I might hurt someone or myself if exposed.  But you know what?  I don’t give a rat’s ass if someone else likes it because it doesn’t impact me and because it’s absurd to judge or belittle someone because of it.  Proof:  I recently dated a guy who loves and plays the banjo, and I absolutely fucking hate any music with banjos.  Granted, we have since broken up, but it had nothing to do with the banjo exposure, which I survived and with a smile on my face (he was a big music snob, however, which should've been the first red flag).  But I digress.  The #1 response by music snobs that really makes my blood boil is when someone says "Holy fuck, how do you like that shit?  They have no talent".  Newsflash #1:  apparently the music business isn’t solely about formal training and talent, because there are plenty of artists out there who have very little of either.  Newsflash #2:  just because a band has significant musical talent does not mean I will enjoy listening to them (sorry, Rush).  Newsflash #3:  my self-esteem is in tact enough that such words are not going to damage me, and will only result in me surmising that you are a douchebag who must cut others down in order to feel better about yourself.  I know a decent amount about music and I know a talented musician or songwriter when I hear one.  Sometimes that is the draw, however, music doesn’t always have to be about that.  Sometimes it’s simply about a catchy beat, a strong baseline, meaningful lyrics, or perhaps good memories that a song brings forth.  So yeah, no need to inform me that the Bangles were bubblegum pop no-talent ass clowns, because it won't change the fact that I love their version of "Hazy Shade of Winter" when I hear it.  So fuck off.


Birds.  If there are gale-force winds, does it make it harder for a bird to fly?  Can a tiny bird fare as well as a big one, or would a larger wing span be a disadvantage in this situation because there's a greater area for the wind to catch?  Are some birds just bad at flying in general, just as some people suck at driving?  If so, do other birds flip them the bird when they are flying erratically and cutting them off?  Where does the phrase "flip the bird" come from, anyway?  Regardless, in case you haven't heard, the bird is the word.

Tila Tequila.  All I know about her antics is what I read on online gossip rags, but that is way more than enough to A) conclude she is not the sharpest tool in the shed, B) wish she would go far, far away, and C) state on the record that she has Borderline Personality Disorder.  Mark my words.  You heard it here first, people.

I won't bore you fine readers with my foolish musings any further today.  Now go have an excellent weekend.  That is an order.

October 27, 2010

Yes We Cannabis!


Lucky number 19.  Californians are set to vote on Proposition 19 next week, which would further decriminalize marijuana.  If this passes, it could generate around $1.4 billion in tax revenue for the state with the largest budget defecit in the U.S.  In addition, it would create jobs, free up law enforcement for more serious and violent crimes, treat a variety of medical symptoms and conditions, and would also probably free up some jail space so that there is room for Lindsay Lohan and Paris Hilton next time around.  It's a win-win for all, folks.  Magical, I say.  If you live in Cali, I beg you to please vote responsibly.   

I'm excited about the increased movement in the last several years to decriminalize marijuana around the U.S.  It's about time.  I remember a day when I didn't think I'd ever see it happen.  When I was in high school, which was in the 80's, my english teacher assigned us to write a research paper on a "debatable topic".  Probably 80% of the class wrote about abortion, but I chose to write about the decriminalization of marijuana.  Looking back on that choice, I'm shocked by my own ballsy decision.  Let's face it, by writing on that topic I was pretty much outing myself as a pothead.  As I've mentioned previously, I like to stay out of trouble and generally try to maintain a good (even if somewhat false) impression amongst those who have any sort of power over me (in this case, the teacher, and potentially my parents).  Hence, I'm proud of myself for ignoring that and going with it.  Not only that, but I actually became a member of NORML in order to research that paper.  Back in those days, there was no internet and they actually had to send me a big package of stuff in the mail.  Ah, the old days.  Anyway, to make a long story short, the teacher gave me a score of OVER 100% on my paper, stating that I proved my point so well that she gave me extra credit.  Not only did I feel great about this, but I also realized that my english teacher that year was most likely also a big pothead.  Double score.  I still have that paper.

I hope I shall live to see the day that marijuana is legalized across the U.S.  The many benefits far outweigh any potential negatives (most of which are surmised by uptight haters with agendas and not scientifically proven).  People, there is a reason that the 1960's were all about peace and love and in my opinion it's because of the kind bud.  Plain and simple.  To quote Carl Sagan:  "The illegality of cannabis is outrageous, an impediment to full utilization of a drug which helps produce the serenity and insight, sensitivity and fellowship so desperately needed in this increasingly mad and dangerous world."  Well said, Dr. Sagan, well said.

October 24, 2010

It’s Hard Out There for a Pimp.


First off, KATN would like to send a big shout out to both the universe and the Texas Rangers for granting my wish and forcing a world series that will not include the fucking Yankees.  That more than makes up for the fact that those ass licking Giants won the NLCS.  It’s ironic that I will be rooting for the Rangers to win the series, as I vehemently abhor all things Texas (minus Austin).  We will probably have to endure camera shots of George W. in the crowd at the home games, but I can suck it up and deal seeing as he no longer co-owns the team and will gain nothing from a potential series victory.

Now that we have that out of the way, here’s what’s on my brain at the moment….

Pimpin’.  I found out this weekend that a guy I know has become a pimp.  I guess you could call him a friend, but I would use that term very loosely here.  I have known him for several years now, but we aren’t close.  Our relationship basically consists of going out and partying once every couple of months with mutual friends.  There has always been an element of shadiness to this guy, but he has never been anything but nice and respectful towards me so I am friendly with him but keep a healthy distance.  I guess what I’m trying to do here is avoid judgment by you fine readers, because I’m new here and I don’t want you to think I typically befriend or hang out with people engaged in extremely questionable and illegal activities such as pimping.  I am not thrilled that this is the case, and I didn’t ask him any questions.  Yet.  He didn’t quite brag about his new pimpdom, but his few acknowledgments were proud ones that minimized the inappropriateness and I didn’t want to feed his ego or his pursuit.  Deep down, though, I’m dying to get more detail, but that will all come in due time.  All I know is that he’s involved in exploiting and bartering women’s bodies for money, which of course I am completely against and quite offended by.  Pimp’s defense is that he’s only working with “friends” he’s known for a long time and cares for, and that they would be “whoring” themselves anyway.  Perhaps, but it’s still morally wrong, illegal, and highly risky for a pimp novice.  Not to mention that if these women are willing participants, I’d much rather help them get some therapy (and probably rehab) to move beyond it, rather than simply accept it.  No woman wants to prostitute themselves.  NONE, I SAY.  Anyway, here at KATN we like to play it safe in life.  I don’t like to get in trouble, so I tend to follow the rules and break only minor laws.  Hence, Pimp’s new venture is rather fascinating to me.  What makes one want to become a pimp?  Is this a lifelong goal or an accident?  Does he have any guilt or remorse at all?  Is he worried about getting caught or knocked off by some other pimp that thinks he stole his “womens”?  I want to understand. 

Looks can be deceiving.  Have you ever noticed that the people who many might consider to be somewhat intimidating looking are nearly always much warmer, friendlier, and more polite than most?  I was at a bar this weekend that tends to attract a punk/alternative kind of crowd.  Lots of black, piercings, tattoos, etc.  There are a few other places that I frequent that also tend to attract a similar dark-looking crowd.  The people who hang out and work at these joints are the complete opposite of what one might expect based on their looks.  Whoever happens to be near the door usually welcomes you when you walk in, even though they don’t know you.  They actually say “excuse me” where appropriate (a rarity today, and it grinds my gears).  They don’t gawk or chuckle at the preppy, straight-laced looking metrosexual that happens to walk in, as would likely happen to them if they show up with a mohawk or ear gauges at a foofy wine bar in the burbs.  Have you ever been to a Harley rally?  I have.  Nicest, most welcoming people you could ever meet.  Some of the kindest, most harmless people in my life look like complete badasses.  Just an observation.  I suppose the obvious assessment on this is that, because these people go against the norm, they are used to stares, looks and comments that imply they are less than, therefore, they are much more open-minded and accepting of everyone’s differences and don’t judge as they have been themselves.  They kill people with kindness and politeness.  Pure awesomeness.

October 22, 2010

Let's Get This Party Started.


Hello internets.  Greetings blog world.  I come in peace (I’d like to think).

I feel pressure, this being my first post of this blog and all.  Hence, I will ignore said pressure, because if I didn’t, I’d rack my brain trying to come up with the most monumental post ever about something or other, which would never come, which would mean I’d never post a god damn thing and this blog would remain blank.  I went to the trouble of creating it, so I may as well not kill it before allowing it the chance to live.

So, what you get instead is what this blog will likely be full of at some point in the future: random shit floating around my brain.  There’s a lot of it, folks, and some weighs heavy, some light.  Some of it I have no explanation for.  Please excuse me now for the lack of content fluidity, extensive cursing, and boredom that may result to whomever drops by KickinAssTakingNames (henceforth KATN).    

Here’s what’s on the ol’ brain today…..

Heavy metal.  I am a lover of a very wide variety of musical genres, one of which is metal.  Yes, I am a female over 40 who is a metalhead and that, my friends, is a rare species.  When I say metal, by the way, that includes all types:  heavy, speed, death, hair, thrash, black, glam, power, industrial……it’s all metal to me.  I’m not too picky about such labels, I just want to rock my face off and occasionally let out some angst.   Metal was unofficially birthed around the time I was, but its major growth spurt that evolved into what we think of as “metal” today was perfectly timed to coincide with my prime teen years.  I feel like I’ve watched it grow, change, and mature and I’ve done the same right along with it and never stopped loving it.  Most of my friends, on the other hand, are another story.  Growing up during that time, many of them were also into the likes of Judas Priest, Mercyful Fate, Iron Maiden, Dio, Metallica, etc.  Now, not so much.  I guess their tastes changed with age, or maybe since most of them had kids they felt it was best not to introduce them to bands with names like Cannibal Corpse and Suicide Silence.  Understood.

Here is the problem.  Not having many metalhead friends around my age at this point in life, I often have a hard time finding someone to go to metal shows with, and I’d rather not go alone.  First off, that’s simply less fun.  I’m not ugly, look younger than my age (so I’m told), seem younger than my age simply by being at a metal show to begin with, and my overall look generally fits in with the crowd, but I still don’t want to be perceived by all the 20 year olds as the weirdo “older lady”, or worse yet “MILF” or “cougar”, that goes to metal shows alone.  I’m generally not one to fret much about age, but I admit it becomes a bit of an insecurity when I’m at a rock show that is made up of mostly of people just out of college.  Which is fairly often, as I attend a lot of live shows of all types.  Have you been to an AFI show?  I have.  All the guys around my age spoke to me assuming I was a chaperone waiting for some teenage fans– as they were.  Umm, no, I’m actually here for the show (wasn’t great).  Going to a show alone of this nature also means I become a prime target to get hit on by the male metalhead 30+ crowd, as I’ve been told that they don’t meet a lot of lady metalheads around their age.  This may not necessarily be a bad thing, but I’d rather have a friend with me as a buffer and distraction from unwanted advances.  I’m not sure what to do about this problem, I’m just telling you what’s on my brain, as promised.  I will continue to beg my more adventurous, open minded friends to attends shows like GWAR with me, but I hate that I don’t have a go-to metalhead friend to count on in such circumstances.  Sigh.  Getting older sucks at times like this.

A side note that is related to all this:  A friend and I have visions of opening up a metal bar in our town.  We have a superb concept and name, none of which I will share so as not to have them stolen.  Although we live in a big city, there are no such bars to speak of, and I think it is way overdue and would be quite popular.  Plus, then I’d have all sorts of new metalhead friends to go to shows with, and all the local metal bands would have somewhere to play.  Not to mention that my job would then be to surround myself with booze and metal every day.  Win-win for everyone.

MLB playoffs.  My team is not involved at this point, so overall I’m not glued to the playoffs.  That being said, I keep up and watch games when it works out for me, as I love baseball, especially playoff baseball.  I’m neutral when it comes to the Phillies and the Rangers.  On the flip side, I possess enormous hate for the Yankees, as all non-Yankee fans do, and I can’t stand the Giants either.  I really, really hope that this does not turn out to be a Giants/Yankees world series, because if it does, I don’t know if I can bring myself to watch it.  The thought of having to see that asshole Barry Bonds throwing out another first-pitch, or spectating in the stands with his jerky smirk, makes me want to hurt someone.  Any other world series combo other than that would at least give me a team I don’t hate to root for.  Don’t let me down, universe.

Brett Favre.  This is on my mind because I’m god damn sick and tired of hearing about him.  I used to appreciate Brett, and now I can’t stand the sight of him.  You want to keep playing, Brett?  Then fucking do it and shut the hell up with your annual “I think I might retire but I’m not sure” bullshit.  I’m sick of his need for face time and his flair for drama.  As far as his alleged sexting incident goes, I believe it happened and I also believe that more women will crawl out of the woodwork.  But I don’t really care.  I just want Brett to shut up.  Brett, please quit having random “press conferences” only to say you won’t say anything about any of it.  WTF?  JUST FUCKING SHUT UP AND PLAY FOOTBALL.  We are all sick of having to listen to you.


Well, I’m done boring all of you imaginary readers with my brain for now.  But there’s a lot more where this came from, and hopefully some of it will be much more interesting.

I bid a kick ass weekend to all.